No. of single people I know: Not many. (on second thoughts and careful counting: atleast 10 in my immediate circle)
No. of Wonderful Single people I know: All of the above.
No. of Wonderful single people of the Opposite sex I know: Half of the above.
No. of Wonderful Single People of the Opposite sex I know that are charming, successful, intelligent, warm and fun: All of the above.
No. of Wonderful Single People of the Opposite sex I know that are charming, successful, intelligent, warm and fun; and are looking for mates: All of the above
No. of Wonderful Single People of the Opposite sex I know that are charming, successful, intelligent, warm and fun ; and are looking for mates that I feel Attracted to : None of the above . ARRRGGGGHHHH.
So then is attraction overrated? Is Chemistry really that elusive? Is it even a dependable criteria in the search of a partner? I think I could be a typical specimen of a generation that has grown up knowing arranged marriages are real, and are a non-weird, non-obsolete way to approach matrimony; yet aspire to meet and marry because traditional (and even modern) arranged marriage channels do not throw up matches that work for us. The major reason, IMHO, is that for someone like me that grew up in a small town with traditional values(and learnt to love and respect those values) and moved on in life to a big metropolis with its own sets of modern and traditional systems, we had to balance our lifestyles to accommodate both. In trying to accommodate what we grew up with, and what is real for us now, we made trades off in varying degrees, and therefore developed a persona that became "un slottable" in either Traditional, homely or modern, broad minded classifications. That throws a googly to traditional matchmakers (the neighbourhood aunty, your relatives, your colony mandir ke pandit ji, various siblings and cousins ke inlaws etc) Much to their chagrin, I am sure, they are not sure who to match you up with, because they are not sure who YOU are, and what you have become now!
And when you meet people online or through Modern forums, there are those who want to know if you wear a saree, and if you do, to send pictures because those are the only ones that can be shown to mum. Or that "I finally decided to get married, because jab se Bangalore shift hua hoon, pet kharab rehta hai. Gharwale kehte hain shaadi kar lo, kam se kam khaana to theek se milega."
I think in all this, I have become a confused, resenting, hard person, who is not giving anyone any rope. I need to become less judgemental and enjoy the process of meeting people. For once, the focus needs to be on the journey and less on the goal.
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